March 15, 2025

8 Sneaky Gaslighting Tactics in Relationships & How to Fight Back

8 Sneaky Gaslighting Tactics in Relationships & How to Fight Back

Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse where one person manipulates another to doubt their own reality. Originally named after the play/film "Gaslight", this concerning behavior erodes self-trust and independence, often leading to toxic relationships.

The 8 Tactics to Watch For:

  1. Denying Your Reality
    1. "You're overreacting; that never happened"
  2. Shifting Blame
    1. "If you hadn't done X, I wouldn't have yelled at you"
  3. Trivializing Your Feelings
    1. "You're too sensitive; it was just a joke"
  4. Twisting the Truth
    1. Rewriting past events to fit their narrative
  5. Love-Bombing Followed by Criticism
    1. Extreme affection followed by sudden devaluation
  6. Gaslighting by Proxy
    1. Using friends/family to increase your self-doubt
  7. Withholding Information
    1. "I didn't tell you because you'd get upset"
  8. Projecting Their Flaws
    1. Accusing you of their own misconduct

How to Fight Back:

  • Recognize the Patterns
    • Journal incidents and trust your instincts
  • Set Firm Boundaries
    • "I won't engage if you dismiss my feelings"
  • Reclaim Your Reality
    • Trust your experience and seek support from friends or therapists
  • Practice Self-Care
    • Prioritize mental health through therapy and support groups
  • Confront Calmly & Clearly
    • Use "I" statements to express your feelings
  • Know When to Walk Away
    • Prioritize your safety when there's no accountability

In conclusion, gaslighting is a form of abuse. It's not the victim's fault; the goal of the gaslighter is control, not love. With support and self-compassion, healing is possible. We should trust our intuition, and remember that healthy relationships respect your reality. If you suspect gaslighting in your relationship, you can visit our project "Gasligthing Check" for more information.